Dear Diary, it's me Donald

I loved JFK. He was a real man. Got the best women. Personally I would have stuck with Marylin instead of Jackie but I get it. I couldn’t marry Stormy but she’s more, um, understandable than Melly.

But his brother? The guy eats bear road kill? Who does that? Like, the guy is coo coo. But he comes to me and he’s all, Mr. President I’ve always loved you, they’ve all always loved me, and supported you from the beginning now I would like to be in charge of health. Geez. What am I supposed to do? I figure my food is safe and I have the best doctors so who cares what this schmuck wants to do.

So I tell him, fine. Go ahead just stay away from Ivanka.