Dear Diary, it's me Donald

Elon is a great guy. A little weird, but great. Because he gave me a ton of money.

For the weird part he wants to be in charge of government efficiency. I said fine. You do that as long as you’re not sleeping on the Whitehouse floor. He thinks it’s funny that he named it after his dog. I think it’s funny that two people are running it. Even I know two people is not how you run something. Like I said, he’s weird.

What the hell is government efficiency? He made his money off of government giving him money. Seriously. The guy makes billions on doing nothing. Like selling these carbon credits to companies or something. It’s like bitcoin. It’s all bullshit. But I like him so I say Elon you do what you do best to make America great again. And the guy isn’t even American. Can you believe that?

I wanted to introduce him to Ivanka. You know, populate the planet and all but did you know he’s bald? Elon Musk is bald. That’s not his hair. He paid some Tibetan lady, or stole it while she was doing yoga or something, and had it inserted into his head. Craziest thing. But he likes me so I like him.