Dear Diary, it's me Donald

Been thinking about Jeffery. Had a dream that me, him and Arnold Palmer were hanging on his island. Lots of good times. That island would be a great place for a Trump resort and golf course. Maybe Ivanka will run it? She was in the dream too but I’m not telling you about that diary.

Can I get the military to take it over? My fellow Americans today I ordered our military to seize the island of Little Saint James. This is a strategic acquisition that will help keep our enemies at bay and the Careabean safe from criminals. And maybe the new home of a Trump Resort.

I’m not going to tell them the last part.

OK, she was wearing this white one piece bikini and it got all wet and she flung her hair like Bo Derek in 10.