Dear Diary, it's me Donald

Of course I want Stevie Chunk in charge of dealing with the press. The fake news heads will explode just by looking at him. I mean, look at him. Were his parents a rock and a microwave burrito?

Dana White, great guy, gave him to me. Said something about how they mixed the wrong growth hormones and the Chunk-O-Manic was born. Can you imagine my press conferences? It’s going to be like Wrestlemania. Stevie looks like the guy that used to eat turnbuckles? What was his name? He was a big guy. Hairy too.

Ivanka used to sit on my lap and watch wrestling. I’m gonna invite her over, pat my lap and tell her it’s time to watch some real wrestling while Stevie does his thing.